Tonight begins Yom Kippur, the most serious day on the Jewish calendar. It's the day where we atone for our sins of the past year.
It sounds pretty depressing and punitive--why spend a day going on and on about all of the bad things we've done? Why give ourselves a complex? But truthfully, Yom Kippur is about asserting our essential
goodness, not our faults. We stand before G-d and say, "I know I messed up--but I know that I am capable of
so much more than that."
This is easier said than done. I don't know about you, but for me I find that I struggle with the same things, over and over again. I struggle with anger. I struggle with feeling left out of anything. I struggle with prioritizing so that my family gets the best of my energy, and not the tiny bits I have left after a sea of commitments. I struggle with not getting too worked up about the little things.
{A family photo}
I read books, write lists, put post-its around the house to remind myself what I'm working on--but then, in the heat of the moment, most of those reminders seem to disappear. It's hard to believe that I really am capable of
so much more. It's hard to stand up before G-d and try again, hoping that at the very least I'm moving in the right direction.
But then again, that very trying and failing is the best gift we have to offer G-d. In our humanity, in our faults and our efforts and our steps forward and our backtracks, we create something much more special than what we would have without struggle.
{Some REAL family photos}
So today I will take one step forward. I will remind myself, and G-d, that I can do
so much more. That I am here in this world for a reason, and that I am creating a life to be proud of.
Wishing you all a happy and healthy year--with lots of human moments, and lots of growth.
Photo credits: Abbie Sophia Photography
